Me. At least after what I've been through.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
