That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
