How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
