got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
3pm strippers are depressing
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
