is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
