Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
