exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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