Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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