walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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