I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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