Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize