apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
