I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize