either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
