found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
