chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
This house was built for laser tag.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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