dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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