just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
