Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
