So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
nutella sex= disaster
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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