Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Randomize
