Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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