I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
