I'm so fucking centered right now
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
