he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Randomize
