I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
