it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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