We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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