he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
