CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
