I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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