break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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