butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Randomize
