I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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