talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
