Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
