My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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