Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
