we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
