The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
