awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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