wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Two words: blizzard sex
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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