broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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