I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
