Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
