hotel room ftw
My sheets look like a crime scene.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
