Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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