let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Randomize