just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'm both gender and math confused
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