In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
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