So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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